Questions and Affirmations - The Art (and Science) Of Talking To Yourself

                                     

I Hear Voices...

This is not a statement of paranormal; it is a statement of truth. Yes, we all have an inner voice...Is yours an ally or an enemy? Do you realize you say things to yourself you would never let anyone else say to you? Don't let your inner voice tear you down and strip away your confidence.

All outward success first starts with inward success...learn the secret strategies to winning communication with your self.

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"Men ought to know that from the brain and from the brain only, arise our pleasures, joys, laughter and sorrows. ...Through it, we think, see, hear and distinguish the ugly from the beautiful, the bad from the good, the pleasant from the unpleasant...To consciousness, the brain is messenger." -Hippocrates

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Did you know that each day you have more than 50,000 random thoughts flying around in your head? You might find it interesting to note that we all have voices in our head. Sometimes the voice is calm and reassuring providing you with great confidence in your abilities. Other times, this voice is the negative and self limiting voice that calls into question all of your deficiencies. The voice that brings up all of the past failures and shortcomings and reminds you of all of the things you have going against you.

In sports, this voice is the last thing you hear before you take action. In interaction with others, it is sometimes the voice that challenges your worth in relation to others and weakens our own esteem.

Although we are born with this amazing supercomputer, the most complex and incredible instrument known in the universe, it does not come with an owner's manual.

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Success principles are not secrets; they are hiding in plain view.

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Famed journalist, Edward R. Murrow remarked, "The obscure we eventually see. The completely obvious, it seems, takes longer." They are not reserved for the rich or famous, but to everyone who will apply them. We are inborn by our creator with tools to guide us and protect us and to open the world of abundance to us; if only we will let it.

Like understanding the law of gravity will place you on your bottom if you violate it, principles of success are laws of nature. Every idea you produce consciously produces subconscious activity to fulfill what was first created in your mind.

A farmer choosing what to plant in a field is like the conscious mind. The field itself is the subconscious mind. Whatever the farmer plants, the field grows. The field does not possess a will of its own; it must grow what was planted. It would be ridiculous to think of the farmer planting corn and having beans grow. In the same way your subconscious mind will carry out the actions our conscious mind directs. If the farmer neglects the field and plants nothing, there will still be growth. The growth will be wild and weedy based on whatever was accidentally planted.

Over time the field will be out of control with weeds. In the same way our minds, if not consciously directed, will fill with mental weeds.

There is good news!

The good news is that just like any other skill, you can learn to take greater control of your inner voice and in doing so, create greater control of your life.

"The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind." -William James

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Create Your Destiny

with the

Power Of

Questions and Affirmations

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The Power of Positive Questions

Most people ask themselves the wrong question which produces a negative subconscious effect. You can learn to program your super computer brain by learning to ask yourself the right questions. The key is to ask yourself solution-based, positive and empowering questions rather than negative, disempowered, problematic questions.

In the past, you may have asked questions like the following. "Why am I so fat?" "Why is my life such a failure?" "Why do bad things always happen to me?" "Why am I so stupid?" These questions and all the ones like it take a terrible toll on you.

First they start with a negative assumption, stated as fact with the question supporting the wrong conclusion. If you ask yourself, "Why is my life in the crapper?" any answer you give provides support to the negative assumption. This can be compared to an attorney taking a witness from the opposing side down the path to prove the lawyer's point.

Next time you find yourself doing this, interrupt yourself with the quip, "Objection your Honor; leading the witness!"

Improving your condition comes through asking yourself better questions. This allows the creative inspiration to work through our subconscious to bring about the conditions or magnetize the conditions we seek.

You not only have the ability, but also all the resources necessary to learn anything you need to learn to fulfill any ambition or achieve any goal you desire. The goal for your questions to yourself in any situation should be outcome or solution based. The assumption is that there is an issue that needs to be fixed. Rather than what was presented above, look at an approach leading to an action conclusion. "What do I need to change about my habits to get to my fitness goal?" "What do I want to do with my life that gives me meaning and satisfaction?" "What do I need to do differently to change this string of results?" "What can I learn and apply from this?" "What is affecting my mood that makes me feel my life is not going the right direction?"

Tony Robbins asserts, "Questions provide the key to unlocking our unlimited potential." Probably the single best question you can begin to ask yourself in any situation is, "What outcome do I want from this event/situation?"

You may certainly wish to adapt this slightly, but when you go into a situation, whether it is a business meeting or negotiation or class, knowing your desired outcome is vital. As I began to work on this habit in earnest for myself, I was simply amazed at how many actions I took and how many activities I worked on without asking this clearly up front? I need to research a better mortgage for my house. What is my ideal outcome? Is it lower payments, less interest over time, more house for my money, flexibility? Without knowing the right question, the answers don't help much. What outcome do I desire for my relationship with my spouse and children? Do I know and plan or just let it happen?

We have the power through understanding and training of our subconscious minds to plant the seeds and affirm health, security, happiness, abundance. We also have the opportunity to allow society's programming to plant the seeds of lack, insecurity, fear, doubt, and negativity. I am not speaking about deep hypnosis or anything out of the ordinary.

It takes practice to keep your mind free from worry and insecurity. It takes dedication to constantly feed your mind new information and positive stimuli that will provide positive associations. It takes vigilance to associate with positive people and positive influences. Make sure your questions ask for what you want, not what you don't want.

Remember...your mind is a supercomputer. In addition to the information and educational programming you provide as input to your computer, how you talk to yourself and the questions you ask is the most influential factor in your outcome.

The Simple Power of Affirmations

We need to find a way to control our thoughts to keep them as allies rather than adversaries. In her book, The Secret Door To Success, the late Florence Scovel Shinn talks about having a Watchman at the gate of our thoughts. Her assertion is that we have the power to choose our thoughts. She uses an analogy of a single sheep dog controlling frightened sheep into the pen through gentle determination.

"We cannot always control our thoughts, but we can control our words, and repetition impresses the subconscious, and we are then master of the situation."

Although her book was written in the early 1900s, she hits upon a tool that is one of the best and yet underutilized tool for controlling and programming your thoughts, the power of affirmation.

Affirmation as a mental programming technique is an extremely powerful tool, yet one that is scoffed at by many. Affirmations are tremendously misunderstood and very much underutilized. What you may not realize is that you use them all the time although most time not to your benefit. Affirmations are simply statements of intent. You can develop into all that you desire to be based on what you chose to affirm about yourself.

I Am The Greatest!!

Mohammad Ali is one of the most widely known and recognized sports figures as a former heavyweight boxing champion of the world. Ali is famous for his repeating of an affirmation he used with great effectiveness to convince not only himself, but also his opponents and the rest of the world. "I am the Greatest!" Mohammad Ali's affirmation created his legacy.

Like goals, affirmations work best when they are worded in the present tense as "I am" or "I achieve" type statements. The mind cannot hold a negative. Affirmations are nothing more than affirming the truth as you wish it to be to instruct your subconscious mind to take action in that direction. It is really very simple.

Affirmations help you believe in your dreams and what you wish to be. Belief is essential to convincing your subconscious to act the direction you want to go. Affirmations are like exercise. You will not see immediate results until you create the habit which over time helps you build strength in yourself and in your beliefs. This ultimately affects your actions which affect your results.

An affirmation in some cases might be a lie at present, but you are in a sense trying to convince your subconscious that it can be true to make it a reality in the future.

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"To affirm anything is to state that it is so, and to maintain this as being true in the face of all evidence to the contrary. Repeating an affirmation is leading the mind to that state of consciousness where it accepts that which it wishes to believe."-Ernest Holmes

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Sometimes we inadvertently affirm and reinforce old established beliefs. "I am so stupid." "I'm going to lose this account." "I always flub this shot." "There is no way I can make this deadline." "I gain weight just smelling chocolate." "I need a drink." "I am a horrible golfer." I can't speak in public." "I could never write a book." "I am such a klutz." "I never win." "I'm not smart enough to do that." "I could never do something like that." "I am such an idiot sometimes." "I would lose my head if it were not attached."

Have you ever said things like this to yourself; or worse to others about yourself? Of course you have...we all have done this. This kind of talk while sometimes self effacing and done for positive effect, can actually have negative consequences. If taken to extreme and developed into a habit or pattern of self talk, the message and programming can be damaging. The issue that separates people is their underlying attitudes and beliefs about themselves. How do you respond to setbacks and adversity? Do you take it in stride, or do you take the glum and negative approach of "this always happens to me, I never catch a break, etc."

The other choice is to create and affirm and reinforce our desired positive beliefs. This happens all day long, moment by moment, and takes hold a little at a time. "This is easy." "I only eat when I am hungry." "I feel great when I exercise." "I know I can drop the pounds when I put my mind to it." "What an awesome day!" "I don't run and hide from problems, I attack." "I feel great!" "My life is really working." "I see a lot of opportunities in this situation."

I have one friend who repeats to herself daily an affirmation of, "I feel healthy, I feel happy, I feel terrific!" Every time I see this person, I can tell it is real, applied and working in her life. Another friend of mine, when asked how she is, replies glumly sounding like the always depressed Eyore from Winnie The Pooh, "I'm here."

You make the call which one is progressing faster in their lives. Can you guess which one has more abundant opportunities "luckily" come her way?

The Art (and Science) of Affirmations

When you learn to change and direct your thoughts and your internal communication your life will reflect the change (law of correspondence). Creating affirmations can change your beliefs and change the course of your life. For affirmations and autosuggestion to be effective it needs to have the following six elements. In order to be effective, your positive declarations should embody most or all of the following characteristics:

1. Personal (Usually a statement beginning with I)
2. Positive (The mind cannot hold a picture of a negative)
3. Present Tense (The time is now)
4. Short (Easy to remember and easy apply)
5. Specific (A specific target allows for a specific course of action and most direct route)
6. Emotionally Intense (This is necessary to break through the clutter of the thousands of thoughts and images that you are bombarded with on a daily basis)

The real goal is to imbed this into the subconscious to allow it to do the yeoman's work. The only real obstacle is convincing your subconscious that you are serious and committed and that you truly have a burning desire for what you want. Long-term change will only happen when there is congruency between who you think you are and how you act and behave and the choices that we make.

Affirmations are Catalyst for Success

Positive affirmations mixed with emotional intensity produce amazing results. Music is an amazing mood catalyst. To really get the most out of affirmations and create an incredible Incremental Advantage in their effectiveness in your life, I suggest recording your affirmations to inspiring music.

A good friend of mine challenged me to do just this ten years ago. I purchased an inexpensive karaoke machine, put an upbeat instrumental tape in and recorded all of the affirmations I could create to change behaviors and support my goals.

Unless you are willing to step out of your comfort zone and give this a real opportunity to work in your life, you could never know the simply incredible power and way that this mental programming technique can work in your life. I literally wore my first tape out listening to it, but it created significant leverage and results for me. I know the vast majority reading this will not make the commitment to this habit. It is a shame, but for those of you who do, I promise your results in every area of your life will improve as your internal communication improves. I constantly look for, borrow, adapt and write down affirmations. I cannot claim originality for all of them as they have been collected and changed over the years.

• I turn challenges into opportunities.
• I eliminate debt as dead weight and a YOKE around my neck. I will only be as free as I am free from debt.
• I am a leader and a developer of people!
• I am calm and composed under pressure.
• Stress makes me stonger.
• I utilize my strengths and abilities to benefit everyone I come into contact with.
• I actively pursue excellence in myself and others.
• I get up at 5:00 every morning feeling energized and ready to take on the day.
• I face my fears and conquer them.
• I am empowered by the energy that I feel and that flows through me.
• My daily routines are positive and improving.
• I always increase my value to other people.
• I am flexible and adaptable in every situation. I look for creative alternatives and seek out new ways of accomplishing my goals.
• I have money in savings and a balanced plan for security and income growth.
• I see people, not as they are, but rather for what they can be.
• I am a strong, motivated and extremely dedicated leader.
• I am a great leader and achieve my victories through the victories of those I serve.
• I choose to spend my time with positive and forward thinking life affirming people.
• I am persistent in the pursuit of my goals.
• Solutions and alternative ideas come easy for me.
• I take time each day to play and to enjoy my family.
• I am an excellent role model for others.
• I forget the mistakes of the past and press on to my greatest achievement.

"What a man thinks of himself that is what determines, or rather indicates his fate."

"I have learned this at least by my experiment: that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours."

-Henry David Thoreau

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Excerpted from Stack The Logs!

by Frank F. Lunn

for information about "Building a Success Framework to Reach Your Dreams," other valuable success resources or to purchase your copy, please visit www.stackthelogs.com or email tim@kahunaworld.com.

Frank F. Lunn is an expert in leadership, marketing, and small business entrepreneurship. A former military officer and Gulf War veteran, Lunn is the founder of the Kahuna Business Group, a $20 million annual company. Lunn is the author of STACK THE LOGS!: Building a Success Framework to Reach Your Dreams, pledging to donate 10 percent of all sales to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, where his son’s life was saved.

tim@kahunaworld.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/29078

When You Attract Negative People, Be Thankful

                                         

Laws of Attraction are clearly defined. What comes back is a reflection of the energy you are radiating. If negative people are being attracted to you, then be self-assured that you are sending out energy that appeared on their radar screen.

Instead of focusing on not trying to attract them. Be thankful you are.

Okay, you say, that might be pushing it a little. Not really. You see, whatever you are attracting is giving you a clear projection of the energy that you are giving off. Or it could be something that you need to heal first in order to clear your energy. Most times, we could not see how we are radiating without this attraction.

The answer is awareness. The key is seeing it quickly so that their negative energy doesn't change or shift your energy and pull you down along with it. However, it's best not to leave until you have a sense of what is showing up. Yet, sometimes, that isn't possible until hindsight mode.

An excellent example of this occurred to me just this week. A quick background in case you don't know me -- I'm very careful of my energy and have practiced the laws. I am also a master practitioner and move with the laws 24/7 which took years to master. Something I'm very proud of and very aware of.

Well, anyway, moving forward to the illustration.

Eating dinner at my favorite restaurant, sitting there writing after a good meal, just finished a marketing story for one of my syndicated columns. Before leaving I thought I would duck into the ladies room. I was sitting on the john -- oops, maybe too much information (TMI) -- when I heard this lady talking to me from the other stall. Actually feeling awkward and caught unaware, it took a few minutes before I could really make out what she was saying. By then, I was walking towards the sink to wash my hands. It wasn't until then did I get the gist of her story, language and negativity. It was a victim story about how the world is out to get her. Let me spare you the details. I know you've heard this before and can easily relate to the energy heaviness created in the room.

I smiled and commented about I enjoy coming to the restaurant. She was too much into her story to hear anything but herself. Yet, she wasn't even hearing herself, I believe. She followed me back to my table and stood over me as I sat down. A few more minutes of this and trying to ignore her and because I was ready to leave anyway, I got up to leave. She walked back to her table and sat. This time I walked to her table and towered over her.

I continued to listen, not getting a word in edge wise for another five minutes or so. I smiled and nodded sideways repeatedly in disagreement. She never paid attention. Finally, I held up my hand in a stop-sign format. This caused a pause. With a deep sigh of thank goodness, I remarked, "I've listened to your story and would like to share with you -- you are attracting exactly what you don't want because that is exactly what you want. Everything that has occurred has been what you have asked for. If you want to change what you are attracting, start by seeing and making new choices. This and only this will change what occurs in your life."

As you suspect, and probably have already experienced yourself, she didn't even hear the message. She continued right back into her story. My immediate and last comment was, "I hope you have a wonderful life and sometime soon learn to see that you're choices are what you are attracting." Not waiting for a response, I quickly turned and left the restaurant.

As I sat in the car, I asked myself, how in the heck did I attract this energy? And in the ladies room of all places? I wasn't radiating anything negative, was I? The answer from the universe arrived immediately. It directed me towards my story that I wrote. When rereading, my attention was drawn to the number of "don'ts" in the article. They were every other sentence it seemed. Then I turned to other articles I had written at earlier in my notebook. The "don'ts" were many. Embarrassingly many.

Tracing my thoughts to when my energy had changed, I realized that it shifted when I started reading other people's ezines that I brought along. I saw it as clearly as the sun rising on this morning's horizon. All the don'ts that people were writing in order to try to sell their products or services. My energy level began to shift with the reading. It continued to spiral into my writing. Their attraction to the negative words moved into my use of negative words. How this and that was hard...finding the target market was hard...and the list went on.

This in turn created me to write in that same tone. My lesson -- be fully aware of what I was reading and its influence on my energy and my writing.

As I look back, I see patterns of where this occurred more than once. And as I continue to trace further, I also remember what I was reading.

If it wasn't for this experience, this negative encounter, I may not have seen this at all. I like to think I would have seen it anyway but in reality, probably not.

Yes, yes, yes. I do wish I had caught it earlier. But let's not go there, huh. That will zap the energy of this story for sure.

The point is, be glad negative people are being attracted to you. Be aware of their appearance. Ask what is radiating from you that attracted them. Be the fly zapper at a picnic and ask why your light was on that attracted the fly. See any patterns and quickly make any adjustments.

Rest assuredly, that when you are no longer radiating negative energy, you will not attract those negative experiences or people. I promise this to you based on experience.

I also always recommend that you share your experience, through writing, speaking engagements, or just with friends and family. There are three people waiting to listen and learn from the valuable lesson.

https://www.facebook.com/catherine.franz

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/3184

Transformative Power of Anger

                                     

Remember the last time you were angry. How would your life be different if you could access that energy to inform your actions? Many of us were trained to believe that anger is a negative emotion. It was something to be denied, suppressed, or ignored. We were taught to hide it from others and also from ourselves. It wasn't nice, it wasn't good. Maybe you used the power of anger to justify your expression in the world, regardless of how it affected others. Either extreme has its consequences. Neither one embraces anger powerfully and authentically.

What if it anger held the seed of tremendous power? What if we approached emotions in general as e-motion - energy in motion? What if our bodies, in their immense intelligence, were trying to stir us into awareness and that 'awareness' was information about your passion?

Most of us deal with anger as an effect, instead of examining the cause or the meaningful message that it carries. We're taught to suppress, ignore, hide, or channel it. Sometimes we come up with elaborate coping mechanisms. We've been taught about anger from the perspective of surface information; like the iceberg, you don't have the complete picture. How do we find out what's really going on? How do we get the FULL picture of it?

One of the quickest ways to gain access to this knowing is through your body, it has access to information that you might not be consciously aware of yet. The KNOWING that I speak of is not the intellect. It is an expanded awareness. In this space there's no grasping, no needing, no have to, got to. Everything just IS... it's the dance of energy.

How do you access this awareness? The first step is to suspend disbelief and entertain the following thoughts:

You're not just tiny specks of matter, being tossed in the sea of your emotions. You're actually vast energies of consciousness and creation. Awareness happens in a simple breath and with it comes all that you want to know, do or be. The simple exercise of breathing, relaxing and expanding your energy field will connect you to this space.

Let's further suppose that anger, as well as any other emotion, is - energy in motion. It's our body's innate intelligence telling us that something new is stirring. From this perspective, what if anger is the tip of passion. I mean think about it: Why would you be angry if you didn't care deeply about something or someone?

The major problem that we encounter here is our thoughts and beliefs. These are the energetic boxes that trap us. The good news is that we now exist in a fascinating reality, no one is fully right or wrong. We live in a time where beliefs hold a lot less power over our lives. There is an inborn fluidity to belief systems now; you have the ability to easily adapt and morph into new ways of being. You can choose the perspective that provides an empowering interpretation. You can open up to new ways of perceiving and position yourself to embrace your powerful potential.

Take a moment to think about what angers you most, what gets you really fired up and fuming? Are there any themes, connections or through-lines? Ask yourself, what is really happening here?

If you're angry, you can breathe, relax and expand to go beyond your current vantage point of seeing what it's really all about. You can tune into the greater picture. Most people shrink their energy fields when they get angry. You can choose the path of power and choose to expand and become something more.

What physical or energetic urgings are creating the situation in the first place? What is the bigger picture that it is pointing to? What are you deeply passionate about? Would you say that you are 'living your passion'? Why not, what gets in the way?

Passion is the fuel for your vision. It's the rocket fuel for your dreams. It's what makes things come alive and creates movement. Anger is the film that covers your passion. It's the shadow of it. If your passion is not there it's because you've been constricting your energy field or you may be going through a shift of passion and vision, moving to something completely brand new. Be willing to allow your passion to dance, evolve and grow; allow what WANTS to happen..

The paradigm shift that I urge you to play with is that you are not a small human being with problems to solve but a vast being with incredible contributions to make. You are living consciousness The more you expand, the more present you become. The emotion of anger holds the key to connecting to your passion. Expand, connect and embrace your magnificence. Life yearns to be expressed through you!

Copyright 2005 Adela M Rubio

Adela Rubio is a Joint Venture Strategist who helps coaches and creatives share their message and build their tribe using engaging listbuilding strategies. She is an expert at creating experiential online virtual events that position you to free your Unique Essence, share your Authentic Message and power boost your reach with Joint Ventures. Let Adela teach you how powerful partnerships can be. Download Adela's free audio "Creating Powerful Partnerships" at http://adelarubio.com today!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/48605

Successful Change Starts With A Shift In Perspective

                                 

Like so many in corporate America today, Susan needed more balance in her life-but she did not know how to get it. Faced with a 60-hour work week and a lengthy daily commute, Susan was left with little time for outside interests. Her job was literally draining her of energy, and her attitude at work was changing, especially within her business unit. Who is Susan? Susan is a composite of thousands of executives who are pushed to the brink by trying to juggle demands on the job with demands at home. Susan could be you. At work, Susan was accepting extra work and projects and was not able to say "no" to her boss. She became frustrated and drained. 

By accepting everything and not speaking up for herself, Susan became increasingly frustrated and angry. She became more demanding and less flexible with her own team. Her usual encouragement to "think outside the box" was replaced by a controlling "do as I say" attitude. Micromanagement became her style. As a result, her staff appeared less involved in their work. They began to distance themselves from her. On the social front, Susan was also making unhealthy choices-spending time with friends and family that were draining and burdensome and then keeping silent and angry about it. She did not have anybody to talk with about her experiences and frustration, so there was no one who could help her develop the perspective necessary to propel her toward greater personal fulfillment. 

Like so many other executives, Susan believed that if she increased her hours and worked harder, life at work would get better. Are you just like Susan? Do you think that if you become more demanding and micro-manage your employees, the job will get done? Do you think keeping silent makes the problems go away? To anyone who still believes this way, this is your wake up call. It does not work. Change is the answer-change coupled with a shift in perspective. But sustaining meaningful change is never easy. It takes desire, intention, a clear vision, a good plan . . . and commitment. Change also takes time. In our increasingly busy lives we often get overwhelmed with demands on our time. Complacency sets in, and we lose the ability to overcome inertia-the tendency of a body at rest to stay at rest or of a body in motion along a certain path to stay in motion along that path. 

To change, we must create structure that encourages and supports change, and it begins with an all-important shift in perspective. Instead of living in silence and hiding-or being overly controlling in our work relationships-or feeling that we need to leave our job-we can start by considering a more fulfilling alternative. In Susan's case, she looked at what energized her, what she was good at, and what gave her joy. She put limits on the amount of work she was willing to take on and began speaking up to make sure her needs were heard and met. She shifted from being a controlling team leader to one that encouraged risk-taking and "thinking outside the box." The result? Greater group cohesion and less stress for everyone involved. Group members felt less restricted and more empowered. Susan added greater value to her company and the results were visible and rewarded. 

More opportunities-the kind of opportunities Susan wanted-started coming her way. At the same time, Susan developed criteria for what she wanted in her relationships. She evaluated her current relationships and determined which ones needed to be addressed. She began to speak up to make her needs known, and in some cases she ended unfulfilling relationships. As she revised her standards and set limits, she gained more energy to try new activities outside of work-re-awakening areas of interest that she had long ago left behind. Susan's success story can be your success story, too. And it starts with four simple steps. You must . . . 

1. Be clear about your intentions to make a change;

2. Be willing to experiment and to try new strategies to achieve the changes you want;

3. Be willing to learn what works and what does not, and to make adjustments;

4. Not let fear stop you from making these significant changes.

To successfully change-whether on the personal or professional front-you need perseverance, feedback, and support to help achieve your goals. But change you can . . . and sometimes you must. (c) 2004, by Steven Bacharach Psy.D. All rights in all media reserved. This article may be reprinted so long as it is kept intact with the copyright and by-line.

Steven Bacharach, Psy.D. is a personal coach to executives who are seeking more fulfillment in all areas of their life. To learn more about coaching and arrange a complimentary session, contact Steven Bacharach Psy.D. by email at stevenb@onthemarconsulting.com, by phone at (508) 358-9565, or visit his Web site at www.onthemarconsulting.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/2637

How Healing The Past Empowers Your Future

                                         

Everyday I meet people who have a chronic upset that runs their lives, and I notice that they are not even aware of it. Often the pain has become buried in their unconscious; or if they are aware of it, they choose to deny any power to combat it.

Yet unless they seek healing, this energy locked up in their mind is a continual drain on their vitality. It is a parasite to their life-force.

The first step to true self-help is willing to be candid, notice what hurts, and find the therapy that is necessary to remove the psychic burden.

Those who do this will find that their whole life will open up. All the things that seemed impossible before suddenly become possible. They realize that they need not be amongst the walking wounded because help is near at hand. All they have to do is ask for it.

Most people deny or push back the events that hurt them, and when they do this, they choose the path of disempowerment.

They are burdened not by what actually happened, but by how they cling to their story of persecution. If it has been awful enough, they even numb out and blank out the persecution.

Their persecutor has indeed won over them; not only then, but also in the now. Their persecutor's malice not only disempowered them in the past, but continues to weaken them.

Often victims think that revenge is a desirable option and they feel that they might draw some satisfaction if they could strike out and hurt as they have been hurt, but often the persecutor is no longer available, and sometimes may even have died a long time ago.

Child-molestors, spousal abusers, terrorists and criminals rank among those who seek revenge, but because the persecutor is no longer available, they act out their rage on others who had nothing to do with their abuse.

Almost everybody has been tormented at one time or another. Those who are psychologically healthy have taken the effort to seek and find healing.

In your case, the cycle of your unhappiness can only stop when you decide that it is time to get your power back Until you make this decision, you will forever be persecuted, because your wounded psyche will continue to do your tormentors work.

Hell, in fact, is never letting the wound heal, but opening it up afresh when thought of your torment comes to mind. And a deeper hell is not even allowing the pain to reach consciousness but express itself through tormented behavior.

How do you let it go? That is the task of skilled therapy.

All psychological imbalances, whether mild, as in a neurosis, or chronic, as in a full blown psychosis, arise from embracing victimhood.

Unless a time comes when you confront your inner tormentors, no self-help course of study can help you "unleash the giant within."

Knowledge is not enough; emotional catharis is a necessity. Even this article can do nothing for you; it is what you do with it that makes a difference. Do you confront your past, and find a healer? Or do you live with it, and continue along the paths of least promise? We are always choosing, even when we choose not to choose.

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Saleem Rana got his masters in psychotherapy from California Lutheran University, Thousand Oaks, Ca., 15 years ago and now resides in Denver, Colorado. His articles on the internet have inspired over ten thousand people from around the world. Discover how to create a remarkable life

Copyright 2005 Saleem Rana. Please feel free to pass this article on to your friends, or use it in your ezine or newsletter. It's a shareware article.

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Seeing Problems From Their Creative Side

                                     

Did you know that winning actually puts less wear and tear on the body than worrying? And did you know that you could worry yourself sick to the point that you'll end up in a hospital bed? And that, depending on the severity of the problem, when it becomes chronic and acceptable mode of conduct, it could lead to options beyond hospitalization? It could very well lead to imprisonment or interment!

Dr. Charles H. Mayo once said that half the beds in American hospitals are filled by people who worried themselves into them. The human mind seems to be like a calculator. Before you can solve a problem with it, it must be cleared of all previous problems. Worry jams up the mechanism; it short-circuits the whole operation.

It has been proven many times that by a simple change in attitude, in mental outlook, the same amount of time and energy most of us devote to worrying about our problems could be used to solving them.

Creative people look at problems as challenges. They realize that without problems, everything would come to a stop. Problems do to our emotions and psyche what pain does to our body: They keep us moving forward searching for a solution. They are responsible for every forward step we take, collectively and individually.

So, if you want to have a lot more fun and a lot less worry, try the following:

* Put your problems in their true perspective.

* See yourself as a part of the world, and the world as a part of the universe, and the universe as a part of a great and mysterious living picture.

* See problems in their true light: a temporary inconvenience.

Every problem has a solution. You may see not the solution immediately, but a solution is a available. You may not like the available solution, but in time you can change it to whatever suits you best.

Think about these the next time you are faced with a problem:

* No problem is permanent.

* Every problem has a solution.

* There are probably a number of ways to solve your problem.

* The same kind of problem has been solved a million times before some where around the world.

* You have the God-given powers to solve your problem.

Remember: When you maximize your potential, everyone wins. When you don't, we all lose.

© Etienne A. Gibbs, MSW

PERMISSION TO REPUBLISH: This article may be republished in ezines, newsletters, and on web sites provided attribution is provided to the author, and it appears with the included copyright, resource box and live web site link. Email notice of intent to publish is appreciated but not required. Mail to: eagibbs@ureach.com.

Etienne A. Gibbs, MSW, Management Consultant and Trainer, conducts seminars, lectures, and writes articles on his theme: "... helping you maximize your potential." He offers management and marketing resources at http://www.maximizingyourpotential.blogspot.com.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8383

To Reach Goals- Bypass Resistance & Gather Assistance

                                         

To reach goals, consider this illustration: If you see roadblocks up ahead on a journey you take a diversion. No one in their right mind would just drive on and hit the obstacle head on just hoping they get through!

Bypass Resistance

When you set a goal and if you are going to successfully reach goals, you need to write down a list of potential obstacles you may face.

Are there people who won't understand your goal and discourage you?

Do physical limitations or unfavorable circumstances stand in the way?

Then list them, analyze them and develop a strategy.

With a roadblock you can turn off before you get there or go over, under and around.

Do the same with obstacles that may seem to make it impossible for you to reach goals you have set.

Is there any way you can bypass the objects of resistance you are likely to face?

Preparation like this is invaluable.

If and when you reach the obstacle you know what to do.

You have already made up a contingency plan so you can move ahead and reach goals you have set!

Gather Assistance

At the same time, it is important to identify the knowledge you will need to acquire or the people or organizations that could give you essential help to reach goals before you.

Research the subject and educate yourself.

Become knowledgeable on what you are trying to achieve.

Do you personally know people who have accomplished what you are seeking?

Talk to them. Get input.

Ask:

• How did they do it?
• How did they feel once they were able to reach goals they had worked towards?
• Can you link up with other persons in that field?
• What organizations exist with support or information you could use?

The internet is almost a bottomless ocean of knowledge. Through persistence you can find pretty well anything you need to know.

So, to reach goals, bypass resistance and gather assistance.

Including these two elements in your goal setting can make the difference between a failed attempt at the target and a bull's eye!

This goal setting article is a part of Michael's 20 minute goal setting tutorial. For more information on each of the seven steps outlined above, go to:

[http://www.about-goal-setting.com]

To develop a program to reach financial goals click here:

[http://www.about-goal-setting.com/financial-goals.html]

For an exceptional course in personal development, Michael recommends what has been called "The Program Of Presidents" - read about it here:

[http://www.about-goal-setting.com/personal-development.html]

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/5079